Because you’re worth it!

Self-worth is a funny old thing. There are many measures of value. You just need to look at the old saying ‘money can’t buy you happiness’, whatever ‘happiness’ is (but that is a whole different conversation!) Presumably it can if that is all you care about. Essentially, I believe it is YOUR contentment and YOUR ability to recognise something desirable or good in what you do.

One of the things that people find hardest to do is to recognise when asked and vocalise an aspect of themselves that they do well.  What I feel is so interesting is that people very rarely, if ever, cite resilience through the experience of failure, disappointment or enforced readjustment as a valuable characteristic.  It very definitely is and it is something that, as a disabled person, I have noticed people are far more willing to recognise in others (ie me!) than in themselves – a weird kind of British self depreciation that borders on the masochistic at times.  Amongst senior employees the attributes that frequently drive success in the workplace – focus, leadership, valuing rewards, prestige, people pleasing, ambition (conscious or subconscious!) are the very same attributes that drive disappointment and insecurity in their own performance.  Those in less senior roles have the added pressure they feel they are underperforming at work.  In counselling there is the well established idea that it is usually the original attraction between the two partners that is now the source of discontent.  If you are ‘successful’ at work why can’t you be as successful elsewhere in your life.  If you are not ‘successful’ at work, why can’t you translate the success elsewhere to your work.

This can all add up to a conscious feeling of dissatisfaction or an unconscious feeling of ‘something is not right’.  Either way leads to discontent / dissatisfaction, which can lead to an impact on other areas of your life.  So, ask yourself what do you do well, were you on time,  did you make someone smile?  YOU take the opportunity to think about what YOU do well and think about it every day for a week.

Easier said than done!

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